Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Thanks, Mom

I was in a relatively good mood today, I really was. I went for a walk and ignored the insistent pain in my ankle, which reminded me that it's been over two years and the doctor is still telling me not to wear cute shoes and omgIhaven'tworncuteshoesintwoyears! So I had a couple chocolates and that seemed to balance things out. And then. And then.

My mom called.

The following topics were discussed:

1. How I need to stop buying packaged meat and buy my chicken fresh at the meat counter so it doesn't have preservatives because my husband's cholesterol is high.

2. How I shouldn't let my husband go on Lipitor because it causes Alzheimer's...or probably does. They don't know for sure. Yet.

3. How my injuries aren't healed and neither are hers--despite the fact that she is thirty years older than me and has only been injured for about two weeks and I've been injured for two years straight.

4. How the economy sucks. No argument there but it's not like I needed the reminder.

5. How I can't get a job and what if I do but then they have to let someone go and I was the last one hired so...

6. How Sarah Palin is insane and the government should have had her killed because now she's in China badmouthing the President and my mom thinks probably Dick Cheney funded it because he's even crazier than Bush.

7. How my grandpa told her that his uncles lived to be over 120 therefore my grandpa is going to live forever. And so is my mom.


Then she complimented me on how positive I've been lately and hung up, leaving me in a dark, listless depression.

I checked my email and my dad said he didn't like the newest draft of my query letter as much as the last draft.

I am going to crawl into a hole with some chocolate and just pretend to disappear.

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